Yahya Smith is a powerful woman who believes femininity is a means to achieve greatness not a sign of weakness. As a mompreneur with a passion to help women have it all, Yahya has developed 2 programs, Feminine Success School and The Success Circle, that equip women with the tools they need to effectively manage their roles as wives, mothers and business owners. She unapologetically pursues greatness with no intent to compromise her desire to be all that God has called her to be.
CEOMOM had the opportunity to interview this dynamic woman and learn how she uses her femininity to take her rightful seat at the table.
Who is Yahya Smith?
I am a wife and a mom. That is such a huge part of who I am. Even before I was a wife and a mom, I was a homemaker. That is a deep part of me, making a home and being a healer. That for me is a part of womanhood. I really love raising my children and being a wife to my husband and taking care of myself.
I am a child of God. I believe in God’s design for a feminine woman. That is the standard to which I hold myself. My husband and I read the Bible and we live by it. It is the foundation of who we are. Our goal is to surrender to His will, this is what my soul has been wanting and what I have been prepared to do. I believe in being a good steward of everything that you have been given including your goals and dreams. As a vessel, that is what I allow to work in me to show other women. You can love your husband, guide your household and be a good businesswoman. The 2 don’t have to fight. Your goals and your dreams don’t have to fight with your feminine design.
Tell us about The Success Circle and the Feminine Success School. What are they and who do they serve?
Both of them are programs I have created with the help of the women who are guiding me, my coaches. It is my way of sharing with women how to do it all, how to keep your goals and your dreams a priority while keeping a peaceful home life, standing up for yourself and being able to speak confidently without causing conflict. We really start from the ground up. We start with the self department to help women to develop a peaceful home life. We want to help you not to overwork so that you are not burned out. We don’t want you to be hustling all the time. Especially for my generation, a hustle is a lifestyle. A hustle should be a means to an end. Too often, we glorify just being busy. As women, we have to slow down to see everything that is going on to be a good steward of everything we have been given.
The Success Circle focuses on succeeding in your relationships. We find that we are not always successful with how we relate to our men. We help you to bring the success you experience with your business into your home.
You created the Feminine Success School and The Success Circle to show women they can have it all. What does having it all mean to you?
It is having a successful business that is generating plenty of finances, allowing you to rest and have your peace. There’s so many different ways that that can manifest for each woman, but it’s creating success as an entrepreneur so that you are not pulling your hair out from having a business. When you are ready to go home and rest you can, because you have intentionally created the space for you to do so.
What does femininity mean to you? Why is it important to building personal and professional relationships?
Femininity for me is the way that God designed the woman side of man. It is nurturing, it is healing, it is softer, and softer doesn’t mean weaker. My husband delivers our babies. He said if it was up to him we wouldn’t be having any more people. In our faith the woman is the weaker vessel, but we don’t talk about the strength of the woman and how she commands respect without demanding respect. A mom doesn’t have to yell when giving her kids instructions. Kids know to hush and chill with just a look.
There is a strength that a woman possesses that is transformative. It is invisible and so powerful that you walk into a room and change the whole tone of the room. It’s making women be aware of their strength and use it. We have been taught that the only version of power is the masculine power so women feel we have to fight for a seat at the table, not realizing that the table was built for us. It has been built to protect the woman. At the root of it is the intention towards the woman. When we realize we are the driving force behind what is going on, we remember how to switch the tone and turn things around. We learn to stand in our own power. Women can relate to men as men and men can relate to women as women. That changes both professional and personal relationships. It helps women work in male dominated professions. Tap into your femininity. A real man is inspired by femininity.
I love this quote you gave for another interview, “What you want is nothing compared to what God wants for you. Realize how much you’re worth and stop giving people discounts!” What does it mean to stop giving people discounts? Is that limited to money?
It is absolutely not limited to money. It is talking about relationships and what women are willing to accept. What kind of love are you making yourself available for? Are you making yourself available for a discounted version of what you really want? We often do the same in our businesses. We have clients and customers we know that are not our ideal clients and customers. They are not on the level for what we are trying to provide them. You end up shrinking yourself to fit into what you are trying to provide for this client. I had to learn to say no in my business and turn down a lot of money because the person wasn’t for me.
We often give ourselves discounts. You know you can do more, but you give yourself an excuse. It’s not just money, it’s with your family and your job, sometimes even with your kids. The kids are not helping around the house when they could be. Know your worth as a mother. Make sure everyone is showing up. We have to start requiring people to enlarge themselves to associate with us. That is a service to them. That calls them out to their biggest selves. We have the power to help people to enlarge themselves and stand up taller. Your presence can cause people to be bigger.
You did a great blog post on your website, nspiyahdlife.com called Losing Myself in Motherhood Did Not Make Me a Better Mother. I couldn’t agree more. How did you regain your self identity?
I had to really sit down. I think I had gotten to this place that nothing mattered to me like shopping for myself. But when I would go shopping for my children I was spending the bank. I was doing everything to make sure they had everything they needed, however I was not filling my cup. There was a point I was going from one child to 2 and my husband was working 2 jobs. I started to resent being a mother and being a wife. At first it felt like my purpose, but as I got deeper into it I started to hate it. I had to be real about that. I had to stop telling myself I was okay with it and communicate that with my husband who was very understanding. I worked to find family members who could take the kids for a couple of hours during the day so I could have some time to myself. I also decided to go on care.com and hire a sitter. I started to dedicate time to me even it was 5 minutes a day or 90 minutes a week. I can not complain about not having me time if I am not dedicating it to myself.
You make the commitment and you be very clear on what that commitment looks like. Whatever it looks like, that is me time. That helped me get back in touch with me. It also helped me set that tone of self care in my home. Now everyone is comfortable taking time for themselves. My husband takes his time. My 8 year old even takes his time. Because I made that priority for me, it gave them permission to take time for themselves.
What’s next for The Success Circle and the Feminine Success School?
We are going into year 2 for Feminine Success School. The Success Circle is year one. My next step is to have a live event component and go to different cities and go global. I am on maternity leave and am finishing my book. Any woman who is not ready for the full course can grab the book and get little gems from that.
To learn more about Yahya, visit https://nspiyahdlife.com.